Gnome Management In The Garden

The Utah State University extension office has a great video on You Tube of how to manage the most invasive garden species known to man, the garden gnome.  Enjoy.
 
Gnome Management In The Garden 

Thanks to lifeshighway for passing along this awesomeness.

Happy Halloween Hangover

Anything left in the ol' candy bowl?  Still experiencing some minor shakes from ingesting copious amounts of sugar and chocolate?  OK, maybe that's just me.  As I prepare to polish off the last Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, I thought it might be prudent to post a Halloween picture or two.

Our Jack O Lantern was grown in Cavalier, North Dakota at the Cummings Family Estate and it was a doozy.  It probably weighed 30 pounds and was almost completely solid inside, so there was a LOT of scooping out of pumpkin innards.  Though thankfully the aforementioned innards weren't slimy or stringy at all, more of a semi-solid spongy consistency.  There was quite a bit of scraping work and flesh removal as the inner cavity was only the size of a small spaghetti squash (can you handle the gourd on gourd analogy?) and needed radical pumpkin cavity enlargening surgery before it was ready to display. 

Since the kids couldn't have candy, a little sausage treat was in order.  It's amazing how well everyone remembers their "down" command when a tasty morsel of sausage is involved.  This picture is shot form the point of view of the sausage morsel holder, nothing but compliant, well behaved pooches as far as the eye can see.

Tito and Shaak Ti watch through the glass as Alycia hands out candy to the Trick or Treaters.  Alycia really enjoys the Halloween experience - handing out candy, seeing the kids in their costumes, and demanding they say "Trick or Treat" before she gives them candy.  She's the paragon of proper Halloween etiquette.

The Coming Death Shortage

A fascinating article on the repercussions of longevity, and how though science may provide staggering increases in life expectancy, the changes in society will be profound.  Subjects from bioethics, technology, population demographics, economics, and inter-generational wealth exchange are covered.  Even though it was originally published 5 years ago, it's still very interesting.  Have a read....

The Atlantic Magazine - The Coming Death Shortage

A New Poll

It's a good one.

Dust off your thinking caps (did you like the snarkiness that I just assumed that your thinking cap was dusty and therefore unused?) and peer into your crystal ball.  You need to look into the future.....

Selling Out

You may have noticed a slightly different look to the blog in the last couple of weeks.  Yes there are a lot more Amazon.com ads then there were previously, but this also coincides with the complete lack of other ads.

I used to utilize Google Adsense to run some ads on the Deaf Dogs blog, but they had some issues with the way that my ads were viewed.  As it turns out, having a loyal cadre of followers can bite you on the ol' backside when it comes to Google Adsense.  They seem to think that you're up to shenanigans when most of the ads are viewed by the same handful of people.  After a while of this pattern, they decided to remove me from their program forever.  Bummer.  You can't fight the Google machine, it's just the way it goes.

I sell out, that's a given, so what to do?  Well, the next (and possibly only) avenue now for the Deaf Dogs and Benevolent Gnomes website to harvest its burgeoning millions is Amazon.com.  If you see something interesting from Amazon.com on the website, go ahead and get it.  You deserve it.  But you only deserve it if you go through my website.  Use the "Search Amazon" box on the left hand side.  Do it.  Do it now.  Don't ask questions.     

And if you happen to be doing a little shopping online and plan on purchasing something from Amazon.com, please go through my humble little website, I'll be most appreciative. Again, use the "Search Amazon" box on the left hand side.  It will certainly make you a better person.  

I'll try to remind you to conduct your Amazon.com shopping through the site again in the future.  I'm also planning on reviewing some books and albums I've recently purchased (and enjoyed) and putting links on the website.  Coming soon....

Job Of The Week

Since I don't really have a full time job, I spend a decent amount of time looking through the local online classified section to see what kind of employment opportunities there are for me in the area.  There are always some very interesting jobs being advertised, and as such, I'd like to start a regular series, hopefully weekly, that I'm gonna call the "Job Of The Week".  In it I will highlight the most unusual or interesting job that I can find in the classifieds on a given day.  I may also select the job for which I feel I am most completely unqualified. 

Please note that this is a real job copied verbatim from the Grand Forks Herald online job classified website.  I have highlighted the most relevant portion, and for the record the position is for "Part-Time Grain Tester".    

Part-time evening shift! Great opportunity to put some extra money in your pockets. Approximately 20-25 hours/week between 12pm and 8pm with few weekends. This is a long term, year round position paying $10/hr. Responsibilities include standing on top of rail cars and running probes deep into trains to do testing. Must be in excellent physical condition as the position will require heavy lifting. Must have a valid drivers license with a clean driving record. Great for students over 18 years old!!

How do the trains feel about all this?

Where The Wild Things Sleep

At night when it's time for the family unit to hunker down for sleepy time, our two dogs, Shaak Ti and Tito, could not be more different in their sleeping proclivities.

Shaak Ti sleeps on the floor next to Alycia in a small bed with her Costco blanket that was given to us when we adopted her (yes it's been washed since then, many times).  We actually tuck her in every night, wrapping her up in the blanket so she's warm and cozy.  On chillier nights, she'll actually wake Alycia up in the middle of the night in order to be re-tucked.  Shaak Ti isn't the problem here.  As usual, Tito is the problem here.

Perhaps it's just another manifestation of his angst against me, or perhaps he's still bitter that my arrival years ago caused his eviction from sleeping in bed with Alycia.  In any case his main motivation seems to be a) annoying the crap out of me, and then secondarily b) getting a good nights sleep.  He generally ends up sleeping in his doggie bed in the office or in his doggie bed near the dresser on Alycia's side.

But his preferred place to begin the evening is underneath the bed directly under my head.  Thus he's in the optimal spot to not only spread his fluff and dander into my allergy prone sinuses but also to keep me awake with his noisy bedtime routine.  I like it to be quiet when I'm trying to fall asleep, and I know he knows this.  Regardless of my bedtime, 9:30 or 11:30 or anytime in between, he doesn't crawl under the bed until I get into bed.  He may be evil, but he ain't dumb.  This is fact.  Anyways, Tito's bedtime routine follows these precise steps:

• Step 1: Engage in oral Yoga exercises and stretch lips, gums, and tongue, by executing a series of loud licking and smacking drills.
• Step 2: Clean, massage, and explore/re-explore male dog parts and surrounding environs with great enthusiasm and vigor.  This step involves grunting, smacking, licking, and general rustling noises. 
• Step 3: Savor the flavors obtained in Step 2 by loudly smacking and licking lips, gums, and tongue.
• Step 4: Repeat Step 1
• Step 5: Clean, lick, and chew (like a tough piece of ostrich jerky) on right hind foot.
• Step 6: Savor the flavors obtained in Step 5 by loudly smacking and licking lips, gums, and tongue.
• Step 7: Repeat Steps 5 and 6 on left hind foot, right front foot, and left front foot.
• Step 8: Crawl out from under bed, stand as close as possible to where John is trying to sleep and scratch at collar and jingle metal tags.  Don't actually itch anything, just scratch at the collar for as long as you can.  Make it jingle, make it jangle, make it tinkle, make it rattle, anything to keep John from falling asleep.
• Step 9: Crawl back underneath bed, focus on staying directly underneath John's pillow.  
• Step 10: Repeat Steps 1-9 as many times as possible, preferably until midnight or 1:00 am.  
• Step 11: Sleep
• Step 12 (optional):  If you notice John get up in the middle of the night, wait until his return to bed, then repeat Steps 1-11.

As you can imagine, this drives me nuts, which I'm pretty sure is his prime objective, except for maybe Steps 1-3, which likely would be executed regardless of his situation.  Alycia sleeps like a stone and has no trouble falling asleep as the Tito commotion is happening.  Alas, I must suffer through his rancorous orchestra by myself until I can finally drift off.

Family Trip To North Dakota- Part II

Here is more of the photo essay from the family visit to North Dakota.

We headed up to Cavalier, North Dakota to visit the Cummings Family Estate and played a little golf at the Cavalier Country Club.  We were able to petition the President and Board of Directors of the Country Club to allow a one time waiver of their usually strict "No Floppy Hats" rule so that my Dad could play.  Here he tees off with his driver on the 105 yard, Par 3, 8th hole.  

Father and Daughter pose on the deck overlooking the western boundary of the Cummings Family Estate.

No trip to North Dakota for the Potato Bowl Festivities is complete without a visit to The Sons of Norway for their annual Saturday morning potato pancake breakfast the day of the big game.  Mmmmmmm....potato pancakes.  

You also have to have a picture in front of the big moose statue at Cabela's. 

A good time was had by all.